Conversational Time Travel

Recently I was an adult volunteer at the RAW Arts Career Night in my hometown of Lynn, Massachusetts. I have not discussed job prospects with random teenagers in years. We tell ourselves we are too busy to volunteer. Rarely does our bubble of influence drift from our family, our friends, our coworkers. I was excited to connect with some of today's young adults and help them consider a career in art or design. Answer questions. Share stories. It was an incredible night. Suzanne Lenz was the best. I did not expect to learn so much in return!

I spoke with 4 or 5 students, each for about 10 - 15 minutes. Some of them want to be game designers, like me. I tried to keep it like a conversation and not a lecture. As much as I vividly recall being a wide eyed teenager considering a career in the unknown field of Graphic Design (I went to college for GD but fell in love with Industrial Design at first sight), I sensed this widening gulf between me and each student. Everything went great but by the end of the night, something dawned on me...

In conclusion, everyone sat in a *huge* circle. Adult volunteers and students. We went around, one after the other and each person shared two things: a) something you learned from the other person and b) something that you learned about yourself.

I learned that no matter how much value you think you can bring to a situation, your efforts will go unnoticed/unheeded/unused unless you find a way to relate to your audience. This realization was like a thunderclap, echoing through everything else that we do (or attempt to do) in our daily lives. Whether it is for work. Or for play. Or a relationship. As I spoke with one student after another, I found myself trying to remember my life as a 17 year old. It was like squeezing into an old suit from way back in the closet, this teenage me who had rebelled against his father to pursue art instead of engineering. Relating to people younger than yourself requires a feat of internal Time Travel! You literally must "dial back" entire portions of your life that Do Not Matter to these younger humans. If you can't do this, I think your voice transforms into those honking "Waht wa wah" teachers from the Peanuts cartoons.

It seems like a lot of the trouble today is caused by not attempting to see an issue from another person's perspective. (I don't even think you need to *succeed* in this "other-view"... you just need to try!) If you don't speak directly to what matters to your audience, all your wisdom or knowledge or enlightenment will just come across as blather. And don't forget to use your time machine.